There are days…weeks…even months sometimes that it seems it would be so much easier to just check-out. There are times I can barely get out of bed. My friends around me seem to have it together, and I pretend. Is there any hope, because if not, I’m not sure I wanna live anymore.
I never imagined how much bringing new life into this world would rock my own! Yes, there are times it’s amazing, but there are other times I think “I can’t do this. I don’t wanna parent anymore.” Am I a bad parent for feeling that way? Will it always be like this? How do I do this and not screw them up and also keep my sanity?
I don’t know exactly what I pictured marriage would be like, but this isn’t it. There are times I don’t wanna be married to this person. Am I wrong for feeling this way? What do I do with these feelings? Am I doomed to choose between being trapped in an unfulfilling relationship or getting a divorce?
I’m single…or single again…and I dream of having that “right person” by my side, doing life together, but it’s not happening for me…or I’m single again, and now things are even more complicated. What do I do in the meantime? I feel alone at so many levels, and the culture around me seems to compound my feelings of isolation and desperation.
Life is filled with tests, trials and challenges. As we get older, those tests, trials and challenges only get bigger and harder, and at times, they can cause us to want to give up and drop out. So why keep going? How do we keep going? What if I don’t wanna anymore?